Eat, Pray, Love, (Clean)

In my previous post I declared that from today henceforth I would begin to live out my joblessness a.k.a housewife life in a healthier and happier manner. As contradictory as it may seem, the couch potato life that I have been living is not only exhausting but it’s not that enjoyable either. It’s one thing to lounge on the couch after several days of hard work but it’s quite another to be confined to a couch (for lack of anything better to do) day after day and week after week.

So today marked the dawn of a new era! Up I got at the crack of dawn (well, around 8 ish) to begin my week. I busied myself with putting away the laundry (never mind that these were clothes that had been sitting out for two weeks and that it was my husband who had laundered AND folded said laundry. I married a saint. It makes me feel even more useless). And I also bestowed upon the apartment a thorough cleaning. So thorough was this cleaning that I even dusted the furniture before I wiped it down. DUSTED. I associate dusting very much with housewives because they always seem to be doing it on TV. The cloth that I was using, however, was not very effective and I ended up knocking stuff all over. I have resolved to cease all further dusting until I get proper equipment in the form of a duster (or is it called a dust mop? Surely, dust mop just seems contradictory…either it dusts or it mops. We just call a mop, a mop, not a wipe mop. Until I investigate further into this matter I shall call it a duster). Anyway, I cleaned vigorously for a full 45 minutes (feel free to applaud at this point) and was literally panting by the time I was done. The apartment was gleaming but I was tired to the point of being rendered immobile – I collapsed on the couch where I remained for the next hour.

As I lay on the couch in a near comatose state, I began to think about what other specific changes I would make to my life to make it happier and healthier (Yes, yes, I will continue to add more household tasks and domestic projects to my daily routine but I mean BESIDES that. After all, I may be a housewife but I am more than just a sum of my chores!). Then I started thinking that this question would be more easily answered if I broke it up into how I could change different dimensions of my life, as in, mind, body and soul. This is what I came up with:

Mind – I will reignite my voracious appetite for reading. Why not take advantage of this free time to get back to something that I love doing? In particular, I want to explore African literature so it’s a good thing that I found this website to point me in the right direction.  I have also found that writing this blog has given me a creative outlet that should assist in the effort to prevent the atrophying of my brain cells (thanks to Real Housewives marathons, though, I fear that much of the damage may already have been done).

Body – My love-hate affair with the gym will have to be rekindled. I really HATE going to the gym. I mean REALLY. People who love working out annoy me to no end and should all be shot at sunrise. Anyway, I will strive to work out 5 days a week. And that’s enough on the subject. As, I smugly mentioned before, I can (at least) cook a decent, well-balanced meal, and will continue to do so until further notice.

Soul – Aaah, what will I do for my SOUL? I must admit that I am quite shy about giving you my thoughts on this one but here goes: At the risk of sounding totally New Age, I want to learn how to meditate (those of you who know me personally can stop laughing now. Seriously. And no, this is not just because I read Eat, Pray, Love). Haven’t you ever just felt the need to be still? To stop the constant, random chitter-chatter in your brain and just be silent? Well, I have. I’ll do some research into some meditation for dummies CDs and let you know how it goes.

(Back to my day…)

After an hour spent incapacitated on the couch I gathered myself with renewed determination and headed straight for the gym. How proud I was of myself as I walked on that treadmill (my pace was far from brisk but give me a break, I’m pregnant!). Afterwards, I ran some errands (wow, doesn’t that just sound so domestic?) before returning home to have lunch, read my Agatha Christie mystery (the library does not have the book I ordered yet) and blog.

But as I sit here at 3:30 in the afternoon, I am so damn sleepy. Perhaps it’s the early morning I had or maybe all of my hard labor. Either way, I’m pooped. Do housewives nap? Not even the ones in Spain? Well, this one does and will.

PS – Seriously people, what is the name of that dusting thing? Is it really called a dust mop?

PPS – If you have any book suggestions, please hurl them my way.

0 comment on Eat, Pray, Love, (Clean)

  1. awura amma
    August 9, 2010 at 4:29 pm (7 years ago)

    Way to go Shiko!!! you did ALL that before lunch?! Good job:-) but please don’t overwork yourself…

    Reply
    • thegreencalabash
      August 10, 2010 at 11:36 am (7 years ago)

      Lol @ ‘don’t overwork yourself’! Don’t worry, I don’t plan on making such energetic cleaning a habit. Once a week is more than enough I think!

      Reply
  2. Sarah Elliott
    August 9, 2010 at 5:23 pm (7 years ago)

    I just read the book, “The Glass Castle.” Though not African literature, you might enjoy the memoir. I also just discovered that you want me dead at sunrise…note to self to avoid you 🙂

    Reply
    • thegreencalabash
      August 10, 2010 at 11:38 am (7 years ago)

      I’ll def check that book out and add it to my growing list of ‘to-reads’. Oh no, Sarah, are you one of those people?! It’s ok, you get a pass because you’re my friend. :-). We’ll just make a point to never discuss your work out schedule.

      Reply
  3. Dutta
    August 9, 2010 at 7:13 pm (7 years ago)

    Interesting Blog. I’ve had this book in my huge purse since May this year, promising to read it. After reading your Blog I feel rather obligated to.
    Again congratulations to both of you. Go ahead and take a nap, Housewives do even though they wont admit it. Even better pregnant housewives are deserving of naps. So go ahead put your legs up, go for pedicures yes get your feet massaged, eat, relax and nap. Enjoy your pregnancy.

    Recommendation Alchemist by Paulo Coelho.

    Reply
    • thegreencalabash
      August 10, 2010 at 11:41 am (7 years ago)

      ‘Eat, relax and nap’ are the best words I’ve heard put together in one sentence.Thanks for reducing my guilt! I really liked Eat, Pray, Love – please read it and let me know what you thought of it? I agree with your Alchemist suggestion… I read it a while ago and LOVED it!

      Reply
  4. Naomi
    August 10, 2010 at 6:46 am (7 years ago)

    Very fun blog! to answer the dusting question, I’ve always used a damp cloth. But there are some products, like Pledge, which are used by spraying on a surface then wiping clean. I’ve never used Pledge et al. let me know if you do and how it works! =)

    Reply
    • thegreencalabash
      August 10, 2010 at 11:46 am (7 years ago)

      Thanks Naomi! Maybe the cloth I was using was too heavy, it was some sort of towel-like material. For some reason, I have this fear (unwarranted?) that my dubious IKEA not-real-wood furniture will spontaneously disintegrate if I use Pledge. Tell me it ain’t so!

      Reply
  5. Kahindo
    August 10, 2010 at 12:23 pm (7 years ago)

    Lol u r hilarious Shiko. Will def be checking back often to see your blog updates. But hmmmm I might have a project for you if ur interested, will inbox you. And I think the dust mop thing is called a feather duster!! Girl please enjoy your afternoon naps, you dont know how much I need those everyday, wished I lived in Spain!!

    Reply
    • thegreencalabash
      August 10, 2010 at 3:53 pm (7 years ago)

      FEATHER DUSTER!! That’s it! I knew that it couldn’t possibly be called a dust mop! Thank you very much my friend for solving this puzzle and for reading. And yes, siestas might become a regular part of my daily routine. Viva Espana!

      Reply
  6. wambui
    August 11, 2010 at 6:43 am (7 years ago)

    AWESOME blog!!! I dont do housework either…. does that mean we were raised wrong??? maybe this weekend I will put in an effort….thats what i have said for more than a month. I need a mboch!!!

    Meditation; It has took me more than a year to manage a 10 min session, I did not know how stubborn my mind was. but in the end I resorted to guided meditation rather than just silence and breathing, I used Sonia Choquette she may be Australian so harder to find. And the book, You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay was a good place to start.

    Love u Shiko keep blogging

    Reply
    • thegreencalabash
      August 11, 2010 at 10:59 am (7 years ago)

      Thanks Wambui! I also wonder if there was something in our upbringing that led to this aversion for housework…this possibility makes me very happy because it means that it’s not our fault! I had no idea that you had tried meditation, wow, a whole year? I hope I have the patience to learn. I’ll check out Sonia Choquette for sure! Love you too!

      Reply
  7. the older cousin
    August 12, 2010 at 2:30 am (7 years ago)

    wicked blog, keep em coming, i didn’t know you were so funny! and congratulations on my upcoming nephew/niece 🙂 now get to feather dusting! chop chop! if that fails you could always go the other way & get a ‘housewives rocks’ tattoo!

    Reply
    • thegreencalabash
      August 12, 2010 at 10:47 am (7 years ago)

      Hi Couz :-)! The tattoo idea sounds MUCH better than dusting and I’m quite sure you had no idea that it was called a feather duster until you read the previous comment. I refuse to believe that you knew that and I didn’t. Thanks for the luv!

      Reply
  8. Roberta
    August 24, 2010 at 3:00 am (7 years ago)

    Gosh your blog is awesome! I love being in the company of intelligent gals talking about random stuff. Your blog gives me that feeling.
    ‘Housewiffery.’ I grew up with this fantasy, and you want me to believe I could get tired of it? Although in my fantasies I skipped ahead to the part where the kids had arrived and I was always making sure the did their chores so I did not have to bother with too much housework.

    Reply
    • thegreencalabash
      August 24, 2010 at 12:24 pm (7 years ago)

      Hi Roberta! Thank you for your kind comments! Going from the fantasy to reality is proving to be quite the adventure! Thanks for visiting my blog, I hope you stick around!

      Reply
  9. Nyakio
    August 30, 2010 at 8:31 pm (7 years ago)

    Congratulations on being preggers. If I were you I would feel no shame about doing nothing after all pregnancy is a pretty good excuse.

    Reply
    • thegreencalabash
      August 31, 2010 at 10:18 am (7 years ago)

      Thanks Nyakio! I’m making great strides in shedding the shame – thanks to comments like yours!

      Reply
  10. Shekyn
    October 15, 2010 at 5:20 am (7 years ago)

    I hope my numerous comments are not spooking you, but this is officially my favourite blog. This piece is so hilarious. Sorry I don’t know what the dust-mop is called. I guess feather duster is a safe bet, as pointed out above. Every time you nap, do so for the rest of humanity slaving away in various parts of the world. 🙂

    Reply

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